Funny Hostel Mates - Part 1

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Many people are not in the school to bag just one degree but two. A degree in their respective discipline and secondly but most importantly, the main degree that brought them to school -- BSC BG which stands for "Bachelor of Beg Beg".
That was how one strange guy I’ve never met in my entire life before trekked almost 50km all the way from his hostel to ask for the crayfish he kept with me, then comes someone with an agbada abi na singlet sef barge into my room and went straight to the point without much ado "I dey look for crayfish". I didn't answer him, I continued with what I was doing.
He now tapped me, "Bros, abeg you get crayfish wey you no dey use again"?
I didn't know what to say. I wanted to tell him that the last time I saw Crayfish was in a Nollywood movie but behaved myself and calmly told him no.
On another occasion, one guy saw me frying egg while passing by and went to buy bread on top my egg.
I was about bringing down my carefully fried one-quater egg from the fire when I saw somebody at the door with fresh bread smiling.
Him: "Chairmoooo" raising both hands up, "I hail oh. How E wan be na"?
Me: Frowning my face "How wetin wan be"?
Him: Pointing at my egg and waiving his bread "I just say make we align"
Me: "Bros, abeg no vex. No be me get am. Na my roommate I help fry the egg.
He had this disappointed look on his face like I betrayed him or something, stared at the egg with this lustful passionate gaze that at a point, I had to check if he had already mentally eaten my egg and left an illusion in the fry pan for me cos things dey happen these days.I was relieved when I scanned his lips and found no oil. He finished God knows what he was doing and left.

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